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The
Bureau of Economic Analysis at bea.gov has put out their latest report of Gross
Domestic Product, and it was, as you would expect from the steady drumbeat
of gloomy economic news, down.
The reason is exactly what you would think: "The decrease in real GDP in the
second quarter primarily reflected negative contributions from private inventory
investment, nonresidential fixed investment, personal consumption expenditures
(PCE), residential fixed investment, and exports", which is where I ran out
of breath, mostly because my heart was pounding in fear and my muscles were
twitching as that old familiar, "fight-or-flight" rush of raw adrenaline squished
into my bloodstream.
For some reason, I think that we are supposed to be calmed that these losses "were
partly offset by positive contributions from federal government spending and
state and local government spending." Gaaaaaahhhh!
Since I find it hard to express the horror I feel as a result of GDP falling
while government spending is increasing, I will not try, and instead focus
on the arcane handling of imports which, of course, seems perverse, in that
imports are a subtraction in the calculation of GDP, so that when imports increase,
GDP decreases.
Not this time, though! You can tell by the way the birds have stopped singing
and the world seems to have caught its collective breath that GDP went down
even more than you think because imports decreased, too, which means that,
again seemingly perversely, GDP was registered as having an increase as a result,
when, in fact, everyone has been laid off and bankrupted as we die a horrible
economic death, screaming in financial pain from letting the filthy Federal
Reserve create so much money and credit all those years so that the corrupt
Congress could borrow and spend us into the calamity of $12 trillion of federal
government debt in a $14 trillion economy, and a system of governments and
public sector agencies that spends, collectively, half of GDP, supports almost
half of the population, and employs directly and indirectly about 1-out-of-3
workers! Hahaha! We're idiots! We doofus Americans are bona fide idiots! Hahaha!
Oddly enough, apparently puncturing my "we're idiots" stance, we know how
to make a profit even as the economy collapses, and "Profits from current production
(corporate profits with inventory valuation and capital consumption adjustments)
increased $67.6 billion in the second quarter, compared with an increase of
$59.1 billion in the first quarter."
I say "oddly enough" because I figured that with sales falling and tax revenues
falling, profits would be down. I was wrong!
Admittedly, accounting was never my long suit, especially the new kind of
accounting where all kinds of strange, bizarre accounting-type things can happen,
like how I end up owning myself and having to sue myself because I won't pay
myself some money I loaned myself against the equity of some money that I had
previously borrowed from myself, which I can't do because of the unrealized
tax consequences of accrued future off-balance sheet liabilities of deferred
contingent options and warrants collateralized into derivatives and related
offsets, a condition which my computer model said could not happen in a million
years.
Like I said, I am no expert on why businesses are making money, and I am certainly
not sure why "Taxes on corporate income increased $40.8 billion in the second
quarter, compared with an increase of $47.0 billion in the first", which seems
at odds with Barron's reporting that the per-share earnings of the 500 largest
companies in America (S&P 500) are, as of Right Freaking Now (RFN), a miniscule
$7.90, while a share of the index sells for the laughable price of $1,029,
meaning that the P/E ratio is a preposterous 130! Hahaha!
I laugh nervously because I am lost and scared, as I am not sure that Toto
and I have ever been in this part of the enchanted forest before, because everybody
seems to be insane enough to buy a stock at 130 times earnings, they seem to
be stupid enough to accept record-high prices (and thus record-low yields)
on bonds, even as a massive, multi-year, globally-coordinated "stimulus" of
staggering amounts of money via "quantitative easing" gets into gear, but yet
these strange people are not buying gold, silver and oil to capitalize on the
blistering inflation in consumer prices this will surely cause!
But as astonishing as this corporate profitability is, for reasons I do not
understand, I do know that the monetary base went to $1.733 trillion from $1.647
trillion the week before, which means that $86 billion of new money was created
in One Freaking Week (OFW), and that is, fortunately, all you need to know
to buy gold, silver and oil, which is what makes it so easy that you rejoice
aloud, saying, "Whee! This investing stuff is easy!"
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